Efflorescence

still life, oil painting, blooms, flowers, botanical

“Efflorescence”

Oil on canvas

18 x 18 x .5

Everything begins with a seed.  We plow, we plant, we wait and eventually, if we nurture our seed, we see the magnificent blooms.  As a creative person, I found that there was a very fragile seed of an artist within me.  From time to time it would start to grow, and then circumstances (in various forms) would tear the fragile little plant away from its soil, and I would be left barren.  Then, time would pass, healing would come, and the seed would once again begin its journey to the surface–and once again it would be destroyed.  It left me feeling depressed, lost, and confused.  I couldn’t seem to find my way.

Eventually I came to the understanding that there was, in fact, an artist inside of me, but in order to see my seed come to maturity, I was going to have to guard and nurture it.  I had to stop allowing circumstances to destroy what was inside of me.  As this part of my artistic journey began, I had to, in essence, go to war and protect what was growing inside me.  Much like a pregnant mother, I had to eat the right diet (positive instruction, trips to the museum, encouraging words, constructive criticism, hanging out with artists, etc.).  I had to exercise (practice, practice, practice), and I had to care for myself (‘me’ time, solitude, investing in myself –supplies and classes). And finally, I had to labor (do the work) to give birth to my dream–all the while protecting my heart from anything that would once again destroy what I had growing inside.

Finally, for the first time, I’ve seen my seed grow and bloom.  Nothing destroyed it this time, although there were some scary moments. This time, I stood guard and protected the seed within me.

I don’t know if this makes any sense to anyone but me, but I share it nonetheless and hope that it encourages someone along the way.

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